Of Pride and Arrogance

Parshas Beshalach 5780

Jews are meant to be moderates. When it comes to the business of shaping our character, honing our very personalities into their best possible version, we are warned to avoid extremism. In his classic formulation of proper character development, the Rambam (Hil. Dei’os 2:2) declares the importance of shunning extremism and of allowing our personalities to occupy the middle of the road.

Only two exceptions are noted: anger and arrogance. Here, the general rule of thumb cannot be applied. So toxic are these two traits that one should drive his character towards the extreme end of the spectrum, developing and practicing equanimity and humility with atypical gusto. Against this backdrop, one understands why the Torah’s description of Moshe as being the most humble man on earth (Bamidbar 12:3) is most notable indeed.

The Torah itself offers a description of the perils of haughtiness:

(וְרָ֖ם לְבָבֶ֑ךָ וְשָֽׁכַחְתָּ֙ אֶת־ה׳ אֱלֹקיךָ…וְאָמַרְתָּ֖ בִּלְבָבֶ֑ךָ כֹּחִי֙ וְעֹ֣צֶם יָדִ֔י עָ֥שָׂה לִ֖י אֶת־הַחַ֥יִל הַזֶּֽה׃ (דברים ח:יד–יז

And your heart will be raised and you will forget Hashem, your G-d…And you will say in your heart, “My own strength and the might of my own hand has produced all this wealth for me.” (Devarim 8:14-17)

One can see the vicious cycle developing: pride in our own achievements leads us to ignore the reality of Divine assistance, further emphasizing our own hand in achieving success. Pride compounds yet further and G-d is increasingly removed from the formula.

The Torah’s stance would appear clear. The holiest Jew who ever lived is lauded for having distanced himself from this quality to the greatest degree imaginable. Pride is a despicable middah, reserved for those who have lost their grip on what it means to live an ennobled life. 

Strange, then, that pride is also ascribed to G-d Himself:

(אשירה לה׳ כי גאה גאה סוס ורכבו רמה בים (טו:א

I will sing to Hashem, for He has shown great pride; horse and rider He has hurled into the sea. (15:1)

It is axiomatic that any quality ascribed to Hashem falls short of His true essence. We are finite people with finite orientations, and the Torah speaks of G-d in a manner we can readily understand. Still, if pride is taboo in the world of middos, why would the Torah apply it to Hashem?

Perhaps a solution can be found in Rashi’s explanation of Hashem’s pride, referenced in the pasuk above:

שֶׁעָשָׂה דָּבָר שֶׁאִי אֶפְשָׁר לְבָשָׂר וָדָם לַעֲשׂוֹת; כְּשֶׁהוּא נִלְחָם בַּחֲבֵרוֹ וּמִתְגַּבֵּר עָלָיו, מַפִּילוֹ מִן הַסּוּס, וְכָאן הַסוּס וְרֹכְבוֹ רָמָה בַיָּם, וְכָל שֶׁאִי אֶפְשָׁר לַעֲשׂוֹת עַל יְדֵי זוּלָתוֹ נוֹפֵל בּוֹ לְשׁוֹן גֵּאוּת

For He had performed that which flesh and blood could not. When one wages war against another, he may throw him from his horse, yet here, Hashem hurled horse and rider [as one unit] into the sea. Anything that no other can achieve may be referred to by the term “pride” (גאות).

The destruction of the Egyptian army was a necessary feat, both to practically save the Jewish People and to allow G-d to show Himself as capable of surpassing the parameters of the natural world. What G-d accomplished at Kriyas Yam Suf was something that only He could achieve. What, then, was the source of G-d’s “pride”? The knowledge that He had fulfilled His duty, that He had done precisely what was expected of Him.

Therein lies the difference. Pride can be an inflated sense of self, the result of seeing myself as the lone actor in my life and ignoring the blessings and Divine assistance provided by Hashem. This is the trait that begets apostasy, the trait that the Rambam demands we distance ourselves from to the nth degree.

But if we believe that proper humility demands that we turn a blind eye to our personal successes, we’re making a mistake. The knowledge and feeling of success is what helps fuel our desire for the same in the future. Ignoring achievement means living without a model of what to replicate and without the motivation to push ourselves to enjoy success once more. Most importantly, a deemphasis of our successes creates a warped sense of the unimportance of our actions: if our successes are meaningless, so, too, are our failures. 

For a proper paradigm, we need to incorporate Hashem’s pride into the fold. A proper assessment of our own successes begins with sizing up what our responsibilities are and an honest reckoning of whether or not we’ve fulfilled them. If we have, a measure of pride is in order. Just as “pride” does not always bear a negative connotation in English (consider being “proud” of one’s children), so, too in the Holy Tongue. The arrogance the Rambam rails against is by no means the brand of pride that Hashem exhibits at the Yam Suf. 

Pride need not make us arrogant. If we are honest about our accomplishments, but also our own shortcomings, G-d remains in full view even as we enjoy the satisfaction of having achieved our goals and fulfilled our responsibilities. If we remain honest, we’ll remain humble. When we do, pride becomes the fuel that motivates future accomplishments, not a stain on the resume containing them.